January 27, 2012

YOUR TURN: THE MAN IN THE BACKSEAT


Hi everyone, I am here to introduce a new feature! Last year I wrote an article and invited readers to write a response from the point of view of another character in the story. I was excited at the response of a reader (see my article here and the response here), so I am doing a series where YOU can not only read my stories but YOU can be in it too! Every last week of the month, I will condense a full story into a flash fiction piece of less than 300 words, then you can rewrite the story from the point of view of any one of the characters in it but in 300 words or less. Send your story to omonaikee@yahoo.com, the most creative response will be published.  Remember you don't have to be a writer to write, there are no rules, just have fun with it!

                                                
THE MAN IN THE BACK SEAT

I walked ahead of the man who stood at the bus stop waiting for a taxi so I could stop one first. Bending down to adjust my shoe, I didn’t see a green coloured taxi approach. Before I could, the man stopped it and slid into the backseat. I let out a hiss as I watched them go. Suddenly the car stopped in its tracks and reversed to a stop in front of me.

"I am heading to Zone 6, can I drop you off somewhere?" the man in the backseat asked.

I got in.

"My name is Ikenna, what's yours?

“Susan". I lied.

"Do you live around here" he inquired.

"Why do you ask?" I demanded. 

“Er, I was just asking" he responded and then fell silent.

Fishing for a comb in my bag, I started to brush my hair briskly. I extended my arm too far and my elbow hit his face.

"Aw" he grimaced holding his face.

"Did I hit your eye?" I asked with concern.

He glared at me. I could see his left eye was beginning to water.

"No, you didn't".

I was sorry and I told him. We didn’t say much else till I got off at my stop.

Later I and my team went for a presentation in a company whose account I was vying for. We were ushered into the boardroom and told the key decision maker would join us soon.

Minutes later, the door opened to admit a tall frame. It was the man in the taxi, Ikenna.

I froze.
                                                      
                                                                    THE END

Good luck with your responses and oh, You can find the full story here

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